Dating Nightmare Part Two: Hold The Mayo

As a Top man I have used pretty much everything as lube at one point or another. From Vaseline, to cooking oil, even the good ol' standby SPIT have been used by me with the purpose of fucking some good boy booty. I consider myself an open-minded fella, but this one guy taught me that even I have my limits of tolerance. This guy hit me up online years ago. He was yet another eager fan of BLACKNIGGAWITABIGASSDICK and was dying to meet me, so I set it up for later that night. Well I get to the guy's place and when he opened the door I thought I was at the wrong apartment. I mean this guy was not hot to say the least, but I saw that he had a nice ass on him, and a mighty piece of meat too so I decided to go in... I wish I hadn't. The place was a complete nasty ass mess. Dishes in the sink, clothes on the floor, black dirt ring around the tub. You name it he had it. Again my eyes wonder back to that big ol' camel ass he was packing and suddenly his housekeeping skills did not matter.

I QUICKLY got down to the nitty gritty and demand him to take his clothes off and lube up his ass. He excused himself so he could do as I instructed him to do. A few minutes later he comes back and gets on all fours so I can hit that thing from the back. When he bent over my smelling sense picked up the aroma of mayonnaise. I thought to myself "Did he prepare a egg salad sandwich while he was gone?" Never in my wildest dreams would I have suspected this nasty ass negro would use mayo as LUBE. I am so serious y'all. The odor I was smelling, that mayo and booty sandwich smell was coming from his hole. My dick died immediately after the revelation. I didn't say a word. I just got up put my clothes on and ran to the car and burned rubber getting as far away from the apt. complex as I could. I later get emails from him saying the usual things that people who have been rejected say. I simply deleted theme and filed him under the pile of crazy ass ATL encounters I had stacked up. I had totally forgot about this until earlier this evening I saw a commercial for low fat mayo. I bust out laughing and my brother was asking me what was so funny. If he only knew.

New Year, New Look, New Format

Wow, it has been nearly a month since I have posted an actual full fledged post in my blog. I hope you guys missed a brotha while I was gone. A few things have happened since my last post. I celebrated turning 28 years old (as y'all already know), I finished another semester of school (didn't do that great, but that's another story), started what most people would called "resolutions" a bit early this year.I promised myself I would keep on the path of good health, and I am doing well so far. I also did NOT celebrate Christmas this year. There were a couple of reasons the mister and I decided not to do it this year. The big one being we had other responsibilities that didn't allow us to have disposable funds to go Christmas shopping (although we did take advantage of some awesome IKEA deals for ourselves), and the other reason was... to be honest we are sick of the whole material propaganda of Christmas so we decided not to be a part of it this year. I must admit not having to worry about what I was going to get people for Christmas felt GREAT. I should have done this years ago. The mister and I came up with the idea that our Christmas presents to each will be to go on a oversees vacation in the spring time.

Oh, and how could I forget to say this... HAPPY NEW YEAR EVERYBODY!!! I hope 2008 was good for y'all and if it wasn't I want to wish you that your 2009 be much much better. I don't make resolutions. I think the concept of waiting until Jan.1st to better yourself is ridiculous. If you come to the decision that you want to make positive changes in your life why not start right then and there at that very moment? Instead what I do is make an "audit" of myself and analyse where I am and where I want to be. I continue on that path until I decide if I should continue or start on a new path. One of those changes I have decided is with this blog and the readers I have come to appreciate. I am still very much a blogging rookie, and when I got the "blog fever" a few months ago I felt that I must blog each and every day, sometimes several times a day. The man that introduced me to blogging (Mr. Thaddus Works) posted something like 400+ entries in 2008, and I thought I had to do that as well. My new outlook is that whenever I have something I want to say that is when I will post. If that is everyday or simply once a month it doesn't matter. I want what I type on these pages to mean something, and to reach people. Not just simply feel I have to put fresh content on here just for the sake of putting new stuff here.

With this new found view on how I will for now on approach blogging comes a new look and format to my page. I still want to keep it simple. No flashy buttons, or glitter, or exploding pictures. I want my page to be a representation of my personality, simple but beautiful. Last year the look and even the description of my page was sooooo overly dramatic. That shadow picture of me, the dark black and blue colors, the title. All of those things did represent how I was feeling. A little uncertain of how to let people see the light side of me. It has always been easier for me to cast off the dark and moody side of me that often repels people from getting to know the real me. The ones that do decide to stay and dig through the hard external dark shell are rewarded with the sunshine of my real self. I wish I could be that way all the time. But the years of building up my dark and moody shell have taken their toll on me. I fear I no longer know how to present the light side of me. This new look of my blog is where I start to try to give the light side of me a chance to shine thru and control the dark side. I want to start to appreciate myself more, and welcome people in. I have to learn that not everyone will abuse my trust.

Welcome the new SJB page, hope you enjoy.